Science

For those who homeschool, it probably seems perfectly natural that homeschool-related blogs show up fairly regularly here in my little corner. If you don't homeschool, just know that I never planned to be one of "those" people who talks about homeschool all the time. At first, homeschool was this "thing" that came to me...(trust me, I did NOT come to it)...it was supposed to be a compartment of my life. It's not. It refuses to be contained. It keeps taking over rooms, shelves, thoughts, bedtimes, printer ink, and days. It gets all up in my business everywhere I turn. At bedtime last night as we were reading, Joseph asked me, "Mom, do homeschooled kids get a good education?"

Ummm, why is he asking me this? Calmly I answered, "Sure, honey." Inside, I confess I quaked just a little, mostly realizing my abysmal shortfalls in science and handwriting education. Has he noticed?

I can't talk about handwriting. The subject is so painful. I'm up against some sort of DNA issue here. I just can't talk about it.

As for science, just the word fills the air around me with uncertainty, failure, indecisiveness, and flat-out rancid fear. I just don't think I'm doing enough. I have printed out all the state guidelines for each grade. It didn't help. They are strangely vague and blatantly unhelpful. Various science textbooks have been a bust. Experiments at home? So bad. Just so bad. I think the only ones that have actually worked have been baking soda/vinegar volcanoes (I mean who can't make that work), mentos in diet soda (again, really a no-fail), the potato clock (surprised all of us that it worked), and the homemade fire extinguisher. (Sadly, I didn't help with that one. It was all Brian.) We have lists of failed experiments. It's embarrassing.

Thankfully my kids have an enrichment program that gives them science. They come home happily describing amazing experiments and what they learned about DNA. I will also say that we have checked out and read stacks and stacks and stacks of various library books about areas of science over the years. I think we have read every book on outer space, most on the human body, and a ridiculous stack about weather, oceans, and volcanoes. We have watched every Bill Nye ever made. We have watched all of "Planet Earth" and "Human Planet" (both amazing). Still, I have not found a curriculum that works for us.

Just moments ago, however, an exchange occurred which has not exactly bolstered my confidence in what I'm doing to provide a comprehensive science education.

Me: Hey boys! Look at this little guy on Elijah's desk!!

Joseph: Oh, is it a wolf spider?

Me: Ummm, no. [giving Joseph a rather incredulous look] What do you think it is?

Elijah: An eel?

[My note: The "little guy" in question was 3mm long and barely visible without a magnifying glass. It had multiple legs and was a bit caterpillarish or something. It didn't remotely look like a wolf spider or an eel. As if I would calmly announce the presence of either on a desk in the schoolroom. Good grief.]

Yes, I was a biology major for two years. Sad. Just sad. Maybe we'll go to the library today and look for books on how to positively identify an eel. I suspect the first criteria may have something to do with "it is almost always found underwater and rarely on desks in the open air".